Want to reduce feeling anxious? Many women I encounter feel like they are "pulling the wool" over on people when they are praised or respected.  I find people can feel like a "fraud" about their achievements (at work, home, with their relationships). Women tend to feel more shame for more reasons than men do anyway. This "imposter" feeling can be hard to identify but once it is you can deal with it. When it gets dealt with, your anxiety goes down as you realize it's ok to be where you are, that people who have achieved are not perfect or even close to it.

Originally Imposter Syndrome was a description written for working people who didn't feel accomplished enough. The term was created about 1983. One of the steps to overcoming the feelings is to recognize when you feel different, and possibily disconnected, from others (which makes many women anxious). 

The benefit of being in a support group is that you can learn that others feel like imposters in their situations. You can then stop blaming and shaming yourself as you share who you are.  More self-acceptance through these healthy connecting relationships greatly reduces shame and imposter feelings.

Look for Novembers Mail Tribune's Joy section Holiday article coming out. Expectations are key to holiday joy and peace. Having appropriate Expectations can also greatly reduce "imposter" feelings. It also leds to less anxiety and depression.

Barbara Masssey LMFT

Parkplace Counseling Center

541-245-9610 ext. 3

Medford Oregon