July in the Medford/Ashland area always warms up. Just in time for 4th of July it got hot again. Even if it's not in the triple digits, heat always contributes to tempers flaring as people feel literally uncomfortable. That means stress in a relationship increases especially when a holiday adds to the load of what we are doing, even if it's enjoyable.

The idea of the home as a sanctuary, a place of peace and comfort is important in a relationship and during the heat. I work with couples to focus on building rituals of connection with everyday kisses, greetings, maybe a certain meal together. These add to the emotional "bank account" of good memories at home. When it's even hotter, you can add another ritual such as reaching out with serving cold drinks. (We often don't feel thirsty before we are dehydrated so offering a drink regularly or after physical activity can really help. Avoid alcohol since it dehydrates you.) Lowering your partner's or spouses stress key part of a home ritual. You can't do it all stress reduction for them but you can offer some help.

In the intensives I do for individuals and couples who come from outside the Rogue Valley I also want to lower their stress level. Handling an issue with that kind of focus really gives an opportunity to get through the pain to the other side. If tempers have been flaring, we can see what is behind it without the interruption of other commitements and find ways for immediate relief. If this weather gets to you, consider building  more rituals in your relationship that provide relief from the heat.

And use more of the healthy ways that destress you. Dress light, eat light and stay "light" with others...