Men often ask for me for ideas about a date night. Here's some ideas but the most important part is to show that you put a little thought into it, especially in February. Sexual intimacy may be a part of the evening if you are a couple. (Remember, the "lower desire partner" will probably not want to feel pressured, this is a main reason someone avoids "date night".)

It will feel "different" to do this if you're not used to it. Remember to have a sense of humor about how it turns out! Most of these ideas can be used for getting to know anyone better---your child, a friend or another couple.

Choose activities that you both would be interested in and that allows for communication and activity together. Ask your friends for ideas. They may know of a fun restaurant or other local place that you don’t know about. The following ideas will also help get you get started.

Play Tourist

Most people take for granted the “touristy” places where they live. Call yourselves "tourists" and visit a few places. If you need ideas, stop check out the Tempo on Fridays.

The Rogue Valley has:

• Harry & David and other tours
• Historical sites
• Botanical gardens
• Art museums
• Museum of natural history and/or science (the Planetarium at North Medford High School)
• Walking tours (guided tours through Medford, Jacksonville, etc.)

Stay at Home

Get to know each other a bit more with conversation.  (Basic friendship is key to a good marriage.) Find out at least one interesting fact about your spouse that you didn’t know before. Ask "if you had a million dollars and all the time in the world, where would you go and what would you do?"

Play your favorite games together. Bring out the classic board games or a deck of cards.

Cook a meal together. Have fun learning how to make something new. Or have a pizza night and make your own customized pizzas. Have fondue or a sundae party.

Read a book together. You could either take turns reading pages, or have fun taking on characters’ roles. Or read the book on your own and have a night to discuss what you liked about it.

Get Outside

You don’t have to be an athletic person to enjoy the benefits of the outdoors together. Simply taking a walk at a local park will give you some exercise and some time with each other.

Find a spot and go star watching. Find a book on astronomy and pick out constellations.

Try an outdoor activity that you might not normally do. Or go bicycle riding, roller blading, ice skating, horseback riding, water skiing, or camping together.

Try a new sport together, such as tennis or golfing – even if it is just putt-putt golf.

Take a daytrip to explore a nearby town or a drive through the country.

Learn Something New

Build some memories together by learning something new as a couple. Check out your local recreation center or RCC for classes. Pick something you both have always wanted to learn but have never tried.

Take a dance class together (Evergreen Ballroom in Medford or there are others). Or buy a dance video and learn a few new steps on your own.

Learn a new foreign language, and if possible start planning a romantic vacation to the country where the language is spoken. Watch a travel program together.

Try something new sexually.

Whatever you decide, pick something that you both will enjoy and will give you the opportunity to have fun together. Even something simple as bowling or getting coffee or ice cream together can help build your relationship.

Happy Relating,

Barbara Massey LMFT