This is the time of the year when we know the envitable is happening: it's getting darker. Soon we all will be staying inside, getting colds and being around each other more---what a cheerful way to start this post! With being around each other, more appreciation is needed to keep the relationships going well. Especially with couples the 5:1 ratio is extra important. John Gottman teaches that the Masters of Relaitonships use this ratio to keep harmony and love flowing in the relationship. One negative compliant is powerful, sticks in our brain that five counter statements are needed. Appreciation can include all the kind tasks and comments that your special person needs. I like to include character traits also when i coach clients. "You are a thoughtful person and often think about other people" or "Your patience is amazing especially with our teenager."